now another kind of pain

Last week was flu & cough....now its this severe nerve pain on my back 30cm below my neck. Its painful...I can't even sit upright nor tie my hair properly. Saturday morning itself jilted me up early with this sore...from sore it turned to pain whenever I wanted to turn or do something. Very robotic. I always knew how my mom's back pain is like, its an unfair life we live in. Having gone thru the pain of struggles in life, here when humans reach a certain age in their life, they are conflicted by pains & mental anguish of what has become of them. Nobody wanted to be born unlucky nor befalled with bad events/defects. Everybody wishes to be perfect. Everybody wishes this life is a beautiful one & as pretty as Disney tells it....Just that not many people understands the theory of life...even I get confused sometimes...this society sucks big time, its making everybody mentally ill & stressed out for no good reasons. Its all human made..who else to blame...nobody. Just the era grew & the demands overlaps our fight to survive.

oh soo drowsy~*

Still have this weekend to pass....Just hope no fever nor anything...takutler..omitofot....

Bad habit, bad habit~

Now picking up a bad habit...oversleeping*! Weekends have been dampered by waking up super late & frequent afternoon naps. This is unforgiving, soon, I will be transformed to a depressing/ unhappy/ poor/ big plump potato. NoooooOOoo~ really lost already!!

I've pampered & worried myself too much. Too many negative vibes coming in from all directions. Bad, bad aura~* Charging & making me utterly weak.... Why a? Must never bow down to defeat~ must never bow down to them!!Block those F~!@#$%>> Goto stay focused on my dream. If I don't do it, nobody will~* ;) oh oh oh~ *

Eat my dust suckers!

R & D

its july, end of july instead~ well, 7 months di..hahaha aii~ i must act fast & prompt, need nor delay time & waste it to nothing. age is catching up & money is not well kept*. Look foward to something new coming soon & hope it will boom! ;) Wish me luck hohohohoho

this knot very hard to untangle

knots after knots, knots ontop of knots, more like a bunch of fishnets tangled together... ahhh... really don't know how to solve...very bottled up this mess... denial, denial... say this, that deny, say that , this deny... then how to make it work? don't later one day something happens that time, how? Till when can I see a brighter side to everything rather than the opposite? I really don't know how to help already.. who's fault? takan this solo artist do everything till when wor? can't they corporate to help help meh? tired...really tired.... tired trying to upkeep for their sake... tired for not seeing something cheerful or positive... tired... whenla will I find the happiness we all are seeking for?